The owner of Colorado Springs' only saloon, where soiled doves "entertain" customers in back rooms, Hank Lawson is a handsome rogue who gives the impression of someone who's always standing alone on the outside of the circle, looking in. Hard and wild, yet also sensitive and insecure, Hank long ago built a defensive wall to protect himself from the pain of rejection: a barrier that effectively holds the rest world at bay and prevents him from being able to satisfy that silent hunger for something that he instinctively knows is missing from his life.

 

Born "Hans Lawsenstrom," Hank is a second-generation American. His grandmother, Ilse Lawsenstrom, emigrated from Norway when she was a young girl, apparently leaving behind brother Gustov, an artist. Although we have yet to discover where Hank grew up or anything about his parents and siblings, we've had two hints that he is not an only child. In For Better OR Worse when he tells Michaela that he and Marjorie understand each other, he responds to her agitated request to explain her sister to HER with: "First of all, it's as plain as the nose on your face. missing from his life. She's jealous of you. Always has been."These lines strongly indicate that Hank has siblings to whom he always has felt inferior, which is why he understands Marjorie's feelings toward Mike. Another hint was in his interaction with Preston in Dead Or Alive when he says, "You got brothers" as if that gives him a new insight into Preston's actions.

When his grandmother arrives unexpectedly, we see how deep the love is that Hank has for this small, frail woman with a failing heart. Of Ilse he says, "That's a special lady. She's the only one in my family I ever gave a damn about--and she's the only one who ever gave a damn about me... When I's a little boy she told me I was smart. Could be anything I wanted... You believe that?" These lines throw the doors wide open to better understanding the character of Hank Lawson, especially when he answers Myra's question of why he moved so far away from Nana if he cared for her so much with, "Didn't want to have to let her down." (Woman Of The Year)

Believing that the truth will cause his "Nana" shame, Hank has had letters written to her, telling her of his life as the town tailor, his work on the city council, his marriage to Myra and the birth of their daughter, Samantha. In effect, he has "borrowed" Horace's life, and to keep up the charade he gets down on his knees and promises Horace anything he wants if he will allow him to maintain the pretense until he can get her back onto the train. This is the same Hank who simply grinned at the way he was portrayed in Dorothy's Book , saying, "My reputation stands" and then commented to the others, "I ain't never seen such a bigger bunch of cry-babies. You're all mad 'cause she wrote the truth." While he may not outwardly seem to care how anyone else views him, he is desperate for his grandmother to believe that he's "respectable."

When Emma quits her job as a whore in Last Chance , Hank tells her, "You'll be back. 'Cause there's only one thing you're good for." Something about the way he says those cruel words conveys a sense that Hank has been told that he, too, will "never amount to anything" from the time that he was a child. He appears to be the "black sheep" of the family, and his efforts to keep Nana from finding out his true line of work make it clear that his relatives would consider being a saloon-owner totally unacceptable. Despite the fact that the barkeep was often a powerful figure in a Western town of that era, and Hank appears to do well financially, he's never managed to shake those feelings of being worthless that were planted so early in his life.

It's this long-standing sense of being a failure that prompts many of Hank's actions. His need to prove something to the unseen chorus of family standing in the shadows of his past prods him into competing with Preston to be the first one to build a hotel, makes him have to win at all costs,( The Race, Deal With The Devil ), causes his hostility toward Matthew when he is elected sheriff instead of Hank ( Tin Star, Baby Outlaws, etc)and is a part of his need to possess Myra, since in his opinion Horace Bing "ain't any kind of man--not like me."(Orphan Train). To lose this woman to Horace is a deep blow to the much more attractive, wealthier, more passionate Hank's pride.

Both in The Operation and in Woman of the Year , Hank tells someone that he can't read, and yet Nana, the woman who apparently gave him the only love and security that he ever knew growing up, seems unaware of this. We know that he has at least some education from the line, "I never had this much fun when I's in school," from Fathers and Sons, and Hank is acquainted with legends like that of Lady Godiva as well as having in his vocabulary words like rube, collateral, libation, clientele, gratifying, etc. which seem to imply more formal schooling than his speech patterns indicate. Other indications that contradict his inability to read are that he's quite capable of sorting through large stacks of contracts and other documents to find the one he's looking for, he's frequently seen peering over Dorothy's shoulder as she writes notes on her pad for the Gazette, and he apparently had no trouble learning his lines to play Tybalt (What Is Love )--as well as attempting to "make them better." Memorizing Shakespeare, while not impossible, would be quite an arduous task for someone who is functionally illiterate.We know that Hank is skilled at math, keeps the names, numbers, and odds in his head when taking bets, and he has enough business acumen that he appears to be one of the richest men in town. One possible explanation for these inconsistencies might be that Hank has vision problems requiring the use of glasses, which he keeps hidden in his room, to read, and he considers them "unmanly" or he might have mild dyslexia. At this point we don't know.

Hank is a man who says of himself, "sometimes I ain't too polite. Fact is, I got a downright nasty temper" ( The Secret ), and yet if he chooses, he exhibits the manners of a gentleman, and the cut of his clothing and the style hints that he's something of a dandy. He is skilled at waltzing, offers his hand or arm to assist a lady, brings punch, and otherwise shows that he is aware of proper "parlor room" etiquette when he attends Marjorie at the pre-wedding dinnerparty ( For Better Or Worse ) and when he invites Mike for coffee in Happy Birthday .

Another indication that Hank has the knowledge and skill, although not the routine desire, to practice good manners is the ease with which he slips into the role of a charming, attentive protector to his grandmother. Given the fact that Nana's clothing appears expensive and she has enough money to travel to Colorado, then to Norway, and to visit heart specialists, it seems reasonable to conclude that the Lawsenstroms are comfortable financially, wherever they reside. We know that at least once Hank has visited Beacon Hill, the most elegant section of Boston ( Happy Birthday ), but my sense is that he is originally from the South--which might be any-where from Virginia to Texas--since his speech has hints of a southern drawl.

While we don't know exactly how long Hank has lived out West, we do know that Zach, his son, was born in Colorado Springs and that Zach is 12 years old when Hank openly admits to being his father. If the year is then l868, we can assume that Hank left home no later than l855--and probably several years earlier. We have not been told Hank's age--but if he is approximately the age of the actor portraying him, then Zach would have been born when Hank was roughly age 21 or 22.

There is a break in continuity regarding whether or not Myra came to Colorado Springs with Hank. In Man In The Moon she says, "I remember the first time he (Hank) smiled and told me I was beautiful. It was the first time I felt I was.He told me about his dream of a life out here and brought me with him. I found out later it wasn't the life I wanted." In The Secret Myra contradicts this statement when she tells Michaela that Clarice, Zach's mother, worked there before her time. She further explains, "she was one of us--but he loved her."

It becomes clear just how much Hank loved Clarice--even though she continued to work as a whore--when Zach gives him a drawing that he has done of his mother. Hank, brooding over his bottle in a saloon that's empty except for him and the boy, looks at the sketch, then at Zach, and back to the drawing. Seven years after her death from a fever, we watch as he begins to lose control of his emotions, tears streaking down his cheeks, his lower lip quivering slightly as he gazes at the image of a beautiful woman who meant more to him than any other ever has. When Michaela says to Myra in The Secret"It's difficult to imagine Hank loving anyone," Myra simply stares at her in disbelief for a moment and then walks away, recognizing that Hank is a man beyond Mike's understanding.When we see his reaction to Clarice's picture, we know how wrong Dr. Quinn really was.

According to Olive, Zach was "blue for an awful longtime" when Charlotte delivered his mother of him, and we're meant to assume that he has some degree of autism. As Hank tells Michaela, "Can't hardly do business with a kid standing there gawking," so Zach has learned to hide in a closet when someone knocks on the door. Although he has lived with Miss Ruby, a retired whore, since he was five, he continues to exhibit this behavior and has other signs of environmental deprivation and lack of social skills.

At age 12 Zach has not learned to use silverware properly, appears not to have been taught to perform chores, has never attended school, rarely speaks, and is dirty and disheveled; however, he is attentive to the environment and actions of others, sensitive, capable of learning, and has an amazing talent for art. Despite the fact that he has done nothing to warrant banishment, the townspeople cannot accept Zach and want to move him anywhere that's away from Colorado Springs after Ruby Johnson dies.

Michaela watched Hank intercede when Jake was refusing to cut the child's hair, ride off to search for him when her an away, give him a job in an attempt to help him fit in, and fight two drunks who called Zach an idiot and mistreated him, and while she's patching up his injuries she confronts Hank with her belief that he is the father. After initially telling her to mind her own business, Hank responds to her accusations that he was wrong to leave Zach alone for all of those years with a flash of the hot Lawson temper: "He wasn't alone. It was me that found a place for him. It was me that paid every week for 12 years to make sure he had food and clothes. . . . You saw how they treated him: teasing him--pushin' him around. You think I wanted him to go through that? Everybody laughin' 'cause he's different? Thinkin' he's not normal?. . . . I was protecting him!"

When she accuses Hank of being afraid of what people might think of him for having a son like Zach, he replies: "Who do you think you are--judging me, Lady? You weren't here; you don't know." At that point Michaela lashes out that she knows that she would never do that to a child of her own, which provokes Hank into tipping his head back and delivering one of the classic lines of the series: "What's it like to walk on water, Michaela?"

Challenged by Loren as to who he is to say what the self-appointed town committee can or cannot do with the boy,a fiery-eyed Hank takes the broom Zach was using to sweep the porch of the saloon, tosses it away, and places his hand on the child's shoulder. Glaring at them defiantly he announces,"I'm his Pa. That's who."

In the end Zach leaves for a special school in Denver,where he will study art, accompanied on the stage by Hank. As the two of them are about to board, his face and eyes seem to reflect a deep sadness that he's never had a chance to be a real father to this son of his and probably never will. When the town gathers to say goodbye Michaela looks at the well-dressed man in front of her in surprise. "Why, Hank...you look almost h--," she breaks off her sentence in mid-word.Hank drawls back, "Wouldn't kill ya to say it" to which she replies, "All right, I will: handsome."

When Hank finally confesses to "Nana" in Woman Of The Year that he is a saloon-owner and not married to Myra, he also tells her about Zach: "Nana, I got a son. He lives at a special school;draws real good pictures. Having Zach is the only thing I ever done that amounted to something important." Nana is thrilled at the news that she has a great-grandson, and when she is leaving on the train Hank hands her one of Zach's drawings, a gift which clearly means more to her than any-thing else he could have given. He again offers to go with her to see the heart specialist in St. Louis, but she firmly declines--telling him that he has a business to run. Showing his sense of shame at the way he earns a living, Hank looks away and swallows hard: "You mean a saloon." With her love for him shining in her face, in her touch and in every word, Nana lays her palm against his heart and says: "I know you, Hans. In here. Is all that matters to me." Both of them crying now, Hank holds and kisses his grandmother, well aware that this is almost certainly the last time that he will ever see her.

After she is settled on the train, Hank pauses for a moment on the rear platform, wipes away his tears and pulls himself back together--as Horace watches--and the mask that Hank Lawson normally wears in public is firmly back in place as he goes toward some recent arrivals to invite them into the bar for some "entertainment."

 
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